Thursday, October 23, 2008

From The Deep Dark Deep...

Comes a creature so terrifying, so dangerous, it sends even the strongest and bravest running for cover.

Mothers, lock up your children. Fathers, load your shotguns.

Purple Crochet Octopus Thing is coming for you.

Beware.

Warning: Purple Crochet Octopus Thing should not be handled by pregnant woman, as over excitement can cause preterm labor. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing eats lettuce and crickets. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing likes to go for rides in cars. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing likes the windows DOWN. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing enjoys folk music and dog agility shows. Do not place Purple Crochet Octopus Thing near or on an open flame, as heat causes it to reproduce. Do not drop Purple Crochet Octopus Thing in the garbage disposal. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing is not affiliated with any political party, the Nazi's, the Mexican Mafia, or the KKK. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing should be used for entertainment purposes only. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing needs occasional time alone, and access to a phone every Mother's Day to call its mother. Purple Crochet Octopus Thing does not bounce, sing, or give high-fives.

14 comments:

Kimba said...

Abs! This turned out so cute! Even better than the picture! I think it's time for an entire crochet animal collection! It might even be enough to make me want to learn. What do you say, we have ourselves a coupla babies and crochet during naps? Little bit of Oprah in the background...Brain Flames simmering on the stove...

Abby said...

Let's do it. But I might boycott Oprah. I'm kind of over her lately.

Tanya said...

oh my gosh i am totally over oprah as well! i was in love with her last year and i don't know what it is i can't get back into it. so i love your little crochet project. way cute!

cabenelson said...

Abby, I'm a dude and I even love this. Make one for me... not for the baby, but for me. And put one down for Bear Dog

Kimba said...

I know! We could make our own show. "Whatever, Oprah!". She's drivin' me insane too. I watched one today and found myself yellin' at her the whole time. "Oprah! LET THEM TALK". It was the Ashley & Mary Kate Olsen one. She asked them what they ate for breakfast and then was like, "OHMIGOSH. WHAT I WOULDN"T DO FOR A BAGEL....A BAAAAAGEEEELLLL!!!!!"

I've switched to Ellen. She's cheery.

Abby said...

Cabe, I will totally make you one. And one for bear dog, and I'll fill it with peanut butter. ( I actually made a little squid guy for my cat and filled it with catnip, she loved it!)
Dude, I watched today's Oprah too. And I was like, gee, I just wasted an hour of my life. But AT LEAST I know that Oprah eats a boiled egg, an avocado, and MAYBE a tomato for breakfast. My mind is now numb. I'm ready for my labotomy, Mrs. Winfrey!
Ellen is the bizzomb.

Abby said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Abby said...

OH and what is UP with the live Friday things she is doing now? I felt SO bad for Ben Stiller a few weeks back. She totally didn't let him talk at all (or anyone else).
At any rate, Oprah is far too accustomed to the one on one format for her show. I don't think she knows how to conduct herself in a panel type situation yet. I have loved her and admired her in the past, but this season has been a total downer.
That being said though, if she ever invited me to be a guest on her show, I would totally say yes, because I'm all hypocritical like that.

Whitney and Lish Harris said...

So, about the animal, I was really hoping it would give high fives. That is all.

heather said...

Looking at the picture I was like, freaking Abby made that and I want one too. Do you take orders? Not that I have a baby in the works but I'm hoping one day I could have another one that would be so lucky. :(

Jack & Lindsay Chang said...

I love him! He is so cute (even for an octopus)! When did you take up all these hobbies; crocheting, knitting, sewing, etc.? I think that craft hobbies are probably one of the best ways to relax, don't you? Anyhoo! I might have to request a animal from your collection for my neice, Bostyn, for Christmas. I will pay you for it! Let me know.

Heather said...

yeah, that is about as adorable as they come. Good work Abby!

Abby said...

I would be happy to make one for anyone who wants one! Let me know what colors and stuff!

The Cori said...

Abby, I don't think it has ever dawned on me what a fabulous writer you are. I was seriously drawn into what you were saying! Loved it all. Not to mention the pictures are adorable. Can we have one too?