Wednesday, June 2, 2010

"In Two Weeks, You Would Have A Diamond"

I'll be the first to admit that as a new parent, I've been a little uptight about things.

For instance, when Lydia was first born, I kept a log of her feedings, documenting exactly what time she began eating, on what side she was nursing from, and for how long. I also documented the size and color of every dirty or wet diaper.

This went on for about a week, until I said to my mom, "I think we're a little over the top with the list thing." She looked at me, her exasperation thinly veiled, and blurted, "Ya think?!"

Another example: Since before Lydia came home from the hospital, there has been a sign by our doorbell asking visitors to "Please knock, baby sleeping." When the original sign got blown away, instead of just letting it go, I made a new one, bright orange this time, and made sure to add extra strips of tape to ensure its permanence.

For a long time, we didn't even dare flush the toilets when Lydia was sleeping. We are still terrified of getting ice out of the ice machine, running the garbage disposal, or starting a load of laundry while our angel dozes. If we watch TV while she's sleeping, we have it turned down so low that we have to ask each other what House just said, what Booth just whispered to Bones.

When we were in Utah, I so vehemently defended her sleep that I probably almost got myself booted out of my husband's family. My poor in-law's couldn't even shut a door without receiving a glare from my blood shot, sleep deprived eyes and hearing me hiss "Shhhhh!" like a dadgum snake.

As we left her four month checkup, I was scheduling Lydia's next visit and the nurse gave me several available times. "No," I said. "None of those are good. They are exactly during her morning and afternoon naps." The nurse looked at me, incredulous.

"I know," I replied. "I'm the Nap Nazi."

And she didn't respond.

On Sunday I went to a friend's house to help her with a quilt she was making for her fifth baby, a boy who was born one week after Lydia. When I got there, the baby was in his swing. The other kids were in and out of the house, doors were slamming, and there was a general hubbub that you would imagine in any house with five kids. I'll be darned if I didn't look over in the middle of it all and that kid was sound asleep. No blanket. No dark, silent bedroom.

Sleeping. Like a baby.

And I thought it was super weird.

Why? Because I'm new at this. And I don't know what I'm doing.

And I am desperate to do everything "right".

Whatever that means.


Kimba said...

It's what happens I think - it's impossible to keep your house silent when you have more than one, and the kids learn to sleep through it. I've totally noticed and talked about it with Bridge. I'm a nap nazi too, though I've mellowed as he's grown. I think it was good to be so aware of them in the beginning, because I feel like it set a good routine, it got him to be and stay rested. Now if we miss or severely cut into a nap or bedtime, he recovers almost immediately because he isn't overly tired. And I've received my fair share of questions, weird looks, and eye rolls. :) I don't care. I wouldn't go back and change a thing!

That said, I've learned that they don't need silence. In fact, sometimes silence made it worse. He woke up when it was silent as an infant. He liked a comforting sound (fan!) and with it on, I could breathe a bit. Run the dishwasher. Turn it up a bit. :)

And I still have a sign on my door.

Violadiva said...

Babywise = Mommy crazy.

bridge said...

Take it easy. As long as you're not feeding her kool-aid in a bottle, you're on the right track!

Leslie said...

Those people who give you the look as if you are crazy can go fly a kite (And I giving the nice version.) Naps are important and with your first just do whatever you think is right. When you have another you will realize that they can sleep through anything! Until they are about 1 or 2 and then you will be telling everyone to "SHH" even more than you do now. At that point, it is harder for them to go back to sleep because they want to get up and play!

You are an awesome mom!

The eye rolls that make ME the craziest are the people that give you the glare of "You are the meanest mom in the world" when I say "NO" to the treats, toys,etc at the checkout line and my child throws a temper tantrum. I seriously want to give those people a piece of my mind. So is it better to spoil them just to make them stop crying? I think not.
Good luck my friend. Just give em' all the bird next time. Ha ha.

Shooting Star said...

You are adorable and that girl is one lucky girl to have such caring parents. I can't say that I have the same parenting style that you do, but I say "whatever works!"

Liv said...

That's the joy of being the parent- you make the rules!

Jocelyn Pehrson said...

I've turned into a glarer (not a word apparently) too!! I was at my friends house the other day and Talmage finally went to sleep. Then all of a sudden this car outside started honking really loudly and repeatedly. They thought they were being funny honking at their friends. This went on for a few minutes. I actually walked myself outside, down the front porch and on to the side walk to give them an evil glare. Like they new I had a baby sleeping. They were a bunch of hooligans, gave me a crusty and kept honking anyways. Tal did wake up and was cranky and cried awhile, but eventually fell back to sleep. It is frustrating though when you KNOW they need so many hours of sleep or they will be ornery the rest of the day right????

Bre said...

Okay, I totally know I'm not a mom, but I was laughing so hard and so coming close to peeing my pants. You for sure have a way with words. I can even see your facial expressions when I'm reading this. I love ya and can't wait to see you all next week.